I Need to Stop reading the News

As usually happens when we fly, the flight attendants give us newspapers and magazines that were left on board. Just something to read on our 3 hour flights. Sometimes it's good, other times it is not so good, but at least it is something. Today we got an issue of a British Newspaper. I assume that it was left from someone who had just come back from England, as I have not seen them for sale here...and let me tell you, those newspaper from overseas are GRAPHIC.

The lead story was from Russia and how a gang of 8 Satan worshipers killed and ate 4 Russian teens. The story went into very vivid detail on how apparently these 8 people lured the 4 teenage 'goths' to the cabin out in the Russian wilderness, got the teenagers drunk, and then stabbed each one 666 times. If that was not enough, they then proceeded to cook and eat the remains. Yeah. My thought exactly.

If that was the lead story, what was the second story? I thought you would ask.

The second story happened to be of medical interest. A 36 year old man was rushed to the hospital after lacerating his penis many times. How did this happen? Well, he was trying to find a cure for some of his, well, man problems for lack of better terms, and in doing so, consulted a witch doctor. This 'doctor' told the man he had a immediate a lasting cure. No, it was not a pill, or even eating bark, but rather to have sex with a hedgehog. I guess when you attempt to have sex with a hedgehog, it gets a little irritated, and then releases its spines, and yes, the man got the brunt of the punishment.

Thankfully, the news calmed down after those two stories, but let me tell you, stay away from the English Newpapers!