Is this what it feels like?

For those who don't know, I have a phobia of dentist, dental work, and the like that has really seemed to develop a life of its own. Because of this, doing dental work on me requires a lot. I needed to go in for a root canal last week, but the dentist would not do it on me seeing out nervous I was. So I was scheduled for what is called conscious sedation. Sounds like fun, right?

The night before the appointment you take anti-anxiety medication and the morning of you take an amnesia-producing medication. Well, I did this, and when the assistant called me back, I was still nervous as anything and my blood pressure was through the roof. They gave me another anti-anxiety medication and two more doses of this amnesia drug. Now, the whole point of this 'conscious sedation' is that you are alert to answer all questions, but should be calm, and not remember the procedure at all. That's what I am talking about. Let me tell you...it failed me horribly. Even with all the shots of Novocaine and everything, the minute they started to do work, the pain shot through my body (as the tooth is what they refer to as a 'hot tooth') and I remember every detail of it. Long story short, they still could not finish the procedure, and I am off to another appointment tomorrow. This time, it is full IV sedation though. Put me out.

The point of the post was that, although I remember the pain of the small amount of the procedure they actually did, that's it. I don't remember car rides, or eating, or talking to the pharmacists as I pick up more antibiotics. I don't remember watching TV shows, or talking on the phone, or anything of the like. It is weird, scary even to wake up the next morning, see bags of prescriptions that you paid for, but have no idea why or how they got there. Or to see paperwork that you have signed for medical histories, and additional appointments at places you don't remember being at the first place. It is scary to me that I can be 100% alert (ask Jenae, I knew everything that was going on, when it was going on) but the next morning have no memory of anything. All I can say, is if this is even remotely what Alzheimer's disease is like, than count me out. It is scary to live in a world that you don't remember, that you don't find familiar.